Dearest Readers,
Divide and conquer. Let's cut the campus in half, with a North-Western and a South-Eastern College. We could have intramural games to gain control of the globe, which sits right on the line of demarcation. We could have favorite college of the month contests, with the loser transfering funds to the winner so they can grow their programs. To realign or restructure campus, departments could simply move across the border to join the other college, so it would not require a name change or sewing new banners for commencement.
Your truly,
Lady Whistledown
